Do actions speak louder than words?

Its the end of the year and the Seniors are graduating this Wednesday! I couldn’t be more excited for my friends but it saddens me that so many of them are leaving and the people I’ve looked up to all year aren’t going to be here next year.

Have you ever felt like you wanted to explode with emotion and tell someone something, but you couldn’t express how you felt? Like all these feelings are bottled up inside and you’ve already ran a conversation in your head at least 10 times, but when you go to speak, nothing comes out? Or it goes all wrong and nothing turns out how you expected it to be.t

It’s hard for some people to express themselves using words. Its hard to choose what to say when and sometimes a simple action of gratitude towards someone can impact a person a lot more than a whole thank-you speech.

Take Holden Caulfield for example. He’s the narrator of the Catcher in the Rye and in that story which spans over two days of his life, I got to know how strong his love for his kid sister Phoebe is.

The next part contains spoilers, so if you haven’t read the book, look away!

Towards the end of the novel, Holden comes to visist Phoebe and she’s devastated when she hears that her older brother is planning to run away from home. So she decided that she’s going to go with him and she’s very stubborn about it till Holden reassures her that he’s not going anywhere and that he’s actually staying at home. Throughout the novel Holden constantly talks about how phony everyone is but how his sister is different from all of them.

Phoebe never says that she loves Holden, and what effect would the words “I love you” coming form a 4th grader have on the reader? Not much impact. But when its raining at the end of the novel and Phoebe does something Holden wouldn’t  expect, it shows the reader how much her actions speak her thoughts; how much she loves her older brother.

“The all of a sudden she gave me a kiss… then what she did- it damn near killed me- she reached in my coat pocket and took out my hunting hat and put it on my head.”

My sisters and I share a tight sibling bond at home. Even though we constantly don’t say “I love you” to each other every single day, we show our love in different ways such as making cookies for each other when one person is asleep, or cleaning the other person’s side of the bedroom.

My AP language class this year taught me different forms of expression. I’m not a shy person, but I definitely do not dominate class discussions and I make up for a lot of it on twitter or by writing blog posts on my other blog: ATIC STATE OF MIND: act, think, innovate, create.

It’s debatable. Do actions speak louder than words? For great writers that convey a deep message through their work, a probable no. But for most people around the world? Yes.

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“All our struggles are part of a bigger plan and happy endings do exist”

Its 1 am and I’m awake thinking about school. Instead of sleeping and resting my body for my math test tomorrow, I’m stressing out about raising my average and counting down the number of tests I have till my final exam.

Does that sound like you? That’s been me for weeks now, and not just with math. Its been hard to find an outlet to let the stress away, especially since the weight of the classes seems to pile on me. My parents even requested me to stop baking till my grades go up but I’ve stated a baking company called Miss Khan’s Cupcakery and I’m actually getting orders. I’ve held off on all my orders till summer because I can’t afford to waste a precious minute of my week.

It’s crazy how the end of my junior year is here. I’m finishing this year in less than two weeks and I have so many grades to raise and so many things to do excel in. My SAT is this Saturday and I’m getting butterflies in my tummy thinking about it. I’ve prepped all year for it, but to be honest, I’m not a good test taker. I’m a better writer and I prefer taking essay tests rather than bubbling circles to measure my knowledge.

I’ve actually been feeling really sad for a couple of weeks. All the hard work, effort, and time that I’ve put to my work isn’t being paid off. Take my AP bio class for instance. My group and I were working on a project about morbillivirus infecting dolphins and I spent so much time on that project, more time than my whole group, but my teacher gave us a group grade based off of one random person’s presentation. I didn’t think it was an accurate representation of the grade I should have received on the project, especially since our score was so low.

Coming to school everyday and pretending that everything is okay and hiding my struggles is hard. Especially when life keeps crushing on my head and there is no where to turn.

But that’s why we have best friends.

Meet Rachel Nguyen. She’s one of my best friends.

Happiest when I see her early morning.

Happiest when I see her early morning.

Rachel and I got to know each other last August, when I first met her in my zero period journalism class. We instantly clicked on the first day we started talking and I could see a potential best friend from the beginning. Its crazy to see how alike we are in everything we do. From personal interests to school, we help each other out and sacrifice so much to see each other happy.

Rachel is the first person I see when I get to school at 7 am and I think I’m so lucky that she understands me so well. We’re both such passionate journalists who love writing and motivate each other a lot. When I’m really stressed out about my grades, worried about a math test coming up, struggling with a lab,  or have too many projects booked in a week, she’s the first person I turn to, and she always responds so positively.

The most important thing I learned from her this year is to be happy and always encourage people. Rachel emits a contagious happy vibe and people around her notice it as well. There hasn’t been a day that’s gone where she’s unnecessarily upset or complaining.

It’s the last week for seniors at school and I’m sad to see her go. I’m not losing a best friend, because I know we’ll be close forever; but I’m just going to miss her a lot because I love her so much.

Trust me, they don’t say junior year is the worst for no reason. But best friends know how to make life better.

Khanfectionately,

Zainab